Your manager is known as the Dragon Lady, so you count yourself lucky to have even survived this long in the job. Having Difficult Conversations with Employees (Scenarios) - Actionable Advice. January 12, 2018. Avoiding a difficult conversation doesn’t make the situation go away – quite the opposite. Then, with a colleague, role play how you would engage in the conversations. Feed­back should work both ways. Most managers don’t love talking to their employees about comp. Manager: Your direct report has told you they think they deserve a promotion, but you don’t think they’re ready, because they haven’t consistently been performing at a more senior level. Role Play #1. Give them up to 6 minutes for each practice conversation, then call time. They have to work together. 00:00:00 00:00. Con­sid­er intro­duc­ing reg­u­lar coach­ing con­ver­sa­tions instead of annu­al appraisals, stag­gered through­out the year at month­ly or quar­ter­ly inter­vals. Equal­ly, if their feed­back implies they aren’t being giv­en the tools and train­ing they require to per­form their job effi­cient­ly, this is also some­thing that should be addressed as a mat­ter of urgency. Managing Difficult Workplace Conversations. Our HR software will help you track goals, receive real-time feed­back and mon­i­tor progress for improved busi­ness and employ­ee growth. By Stuart Hearn on 28 Jun, 2018. They debate ad nauseam each project, and you’ve heard from the rest of the team that this person is slowing them down. Most people hate to role play, yet it is an effective way to prepare for and practice tough conversations. 8 Tips On How To Have Difficult Conversations With Employees 1. If you’re a manager, it’s likely that you’ve been in a situation before where there’s a conversation that needs to happen – or news to be delivered – and the time never seems to be right. Most managers don’t love talking to their employees about comp. When hav­ing dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions with staff, it’s not just about what you say but how you say it. Managers are reluctant to participate in uncomfortable discussions because they are not sure how to handle it. and share one with each pair so they can practice without using real-life information. How do you persuade your CEO that you can deliver it, embed it and make it work? Sec­ond only to clar­i­ty, time­li­ness is prob­a­bly the most impor­tant con­sid­er­a­tion when hav­ing dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions with employ­ees. Giving feedback should be an integral part of a manager’s duties. Sense-making. Direct Report: You have a job offer from another company for a lot more money. Engage in the Difficult Conversation … Sometimes you must have a difficult conversation with a … As managers and HR leaders we deal with wacky stuff like sex at work, random poop smearers in the men’s bathroom, and phone interviews where the candidates is taking all bath. Having Difficult Conversations with Employees (Scenarios) - Actionable Advice. This program provides managers with the confidence and competence to have difficult conversations that are constructive, not destructive. Usually it is about some area where the person is not performing adequately. 2. It helps ensure you are jus­ti­fied in your actions and that you are engag­ing the prob­lem in the most ben­e­fi­cial way. The good news is, when han­dled prop­er­ly, and when man­agers are armed with the appro­pri­ate train­ing, dif­fi­cult work con­ver­sa­tions can actu­al­ly be huge­ly ben­e­fi­cial with regards to an employee’s career and per­son­al devel­op­ment. Whether it’s addressing an employee about unprofessional dress, having an unpleasant body odor, or disciplining poor performance, it’s the manager’s responsibility to … 20 minutes total. Having difficult conversations is never easy, but most leaders will have them at some point in their careers. This can give employ­ees the con­fi­dence to voice their own opin­ions, ask ques­tions and pro­vide answers, while giv­ing man­age­ment an oppor­tu­ni­ty to lis­ten to what their staff have to say. The longer man­agers leave it to deliv­er con­struc­tive feed­back, the more bad habits will become entrenched. While reward and recog­ni­tion are, of course, impor­tant when it comes to moti­va­tion and per­for­mance, not all employ­ee coach­ing con­ver­sa­tions are going to be pos­i­tive and uplift­ing. What helped me move forward was practicing the difficult conversations that I needed to have with my teammate. Take your first steps to accom­plish­ing this at your com­pa­ny by enquir­ing about our lead­ing per­for­mance man­age­ment soft­ware. If you react to this with an emo­tion­al response your­self, you jeop­ar­dise clear com­mu­ni­ca­tion and appro­pri­ate messages. What is a difficult conversation? when having difficult conversations with their direct reports. 2013 Dec;26(4):259-64. doi: 10.1055/s-0033-1356728. In the past, we’ve [companies] typically talked about psychological safety in the context of teams. Conquer your fears. Equal­ly, be pre­pared to give your employ­ees the tools they need to suc­ceed and improve. I’m not kidding. Provide feedback: Colleague (2 min. Difficult conversations. Let them know what issues you are hav­ing with their per­for­mance and come pre­pared with exam­ples as an illustration. I tried to have a “hard talk” with her about her behavior, but it went sideways. Mustaches aren’t a big deal in most work environments. Options? Job Title . Difficult conversations are anything we find hard to talk about with another person. When employ­ees per­form a task well, man­agers should recog­nise this effort and accom­plish­ment as imme­di­ate­ly as pos­si­ble to encour­age and moti­vate them. Establishing trust with employees before difficult conversations are necessary and it helps to ease these conversations. John and Mike do the same job. Hygiene issues rank as one of the most difficult type of conversations to have and there are legal aspects to consider. All of these aspects help to pro­mote a work­ing envi­ron­ment where dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions can actu­al­ly be a pow­er­ful tool for change and growth. Inside: Face difficult conversations with employees exuding confidence. Your spouse is a high-energy workaholic who gets more done in one day than most people get done in two. Over the last few weeks your spouse has been dropping hints that sound as if maybe he or she thinks you don’t have very This is especially true when it comes to … action cont. Direct Report: You’re ready for a promotion. Learn how to resolve workplace issues quickly and informally, including tips on how to prepare, manage your emotions, and reach a positive outcome. Seventy percent of employees avoid difficult conversations in the workplace, according to a study by career-coaching startup Bravely, this can lower morale and cause a toxic work environment. Below, we’ll share our per­for­mance man­age­ment best prac­tices so your man­agers are armed with all the infor­ma­tion and moti­va­tion they need when it comes to hav­ing dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions with employees. 27 minutes | 12/15/2020. At TodayTix, an online ticket reseller, HR teams prepare managers using role-play. Cry? Define what has gone wrong and how it can be cor­rect­ed in order to avoid con­fu­sion. Difficult conversations in the workplace are unavoidable, particularly in high pressure situations or environments where customer satisfaction is called into question. Things like these are common place when you are the … We cannot provide pay raises this year. Role-playing takes place between two or more people, who act out roles to explore a particular scenario.It's most useful to help you or your team prepare for unfamiliar or difficult situations. If you typically give annual pay increases but are unable … For example, if I were to role play a conversation in which I want to ask my boss for a raise, I would take on the role of myself at work, and my partner would take on the role … Yes. One of the other managers would play the role of my teammate, and I would practice giving the feedback. You get access to all of our courses, as well as the chance to connect with forward thinking HR professionals in our various communities. Based on their responses, the t… Each person will role-play a different scenario. Having difficult conversations with employees comes with the territory of being an employer. The work environment was becoming less and less psychologically safe; the rest of the team had started to work from home more to avoid being yelled at by her. I remembered how excited I was when I first started listening to Difficult Conversations. It allows you to get a feel for the type of communication that will help to resolve a situation, and the ways in which things can be made worse. Course outline. In each example pair, one person will play the manager role, and the other will play their direct report. Prepare And Role Play . Difficult conversations with employees are unavoidable, whether it’s a performance issue or failed project. What should they try next time? Some people avoid difficult conversations because it makes them feel uncomfortable, but most workplace problems will not go away by themselves. Role-playing on-the-job scenarios help to train and to assess an employee’s ability to cope with both typical and difficult clients. Difficult Scenario 1: You walk into a preschool classroom and see a child crying alone in a chair. Take your first steps to accomplishing this at your company by enquiring about our leading performance management software. By now, we all know that effec­tive per­for­mance man­age­ment neces­si­tates reg­u­lar one-to-one check-ins. Pick another person to pretend to be the recipient of the feedback, and pick a third person to observe the practice session. Perhaps a manager and employee have clashed in the past, and now the discussion is about the worker’s subpar performance. Perhaps you need to have the conversation because of a specific incident or there are ongoing concerns. Create fake scenarios (or use the ones below!) Performance improvement begins with authentic and transparent communication. The four role play scenarios cover difficult conversations about: What should they avoid doing? Let’s face it – no one likes conflict. Never attempt to "wing it" with a difficult conversation. Otherwise, they would not be difficult! And this is especially true when it comes to difficult conversations in the workplace. You are Raj Chauhan, an agency supervisor and you’re about to have a serious conversation with a problem employee. Glassdoor for Employers › Blog › Re-organization › How to Have Difficult Conversations with Your Employees There are about 150 conversations on this site; 75 on this page and 75 on sub page "MORE ROLEPLAY CONVERSATIONS". Difficult Conversation Role Play Scenarios Use this activity to build your own conversational skills to support your professional practice. Most people are as uncomfortable providing feedback about an individual's personal dress or habits, as the person receiving the feedback. These pay conversations are delicate, thorny and can even end in tears. Grab a conference room for an hour and invite all the managers in your organization. ), but I was able to handle it much more productively having practiced. Dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions with employ­ees aren’t going to go down well if they become accus­tomed to receiv­ing neg­a­tive feed­back (and only neg­a­tive feed­back) on their per­for­mance when­ev­er they meet. With A Superior: Be A Trusted Lieutenant. Raising the question of retirement. Per­for­mance improve­ments can only occur if there is clar­i­ty around feed­back. It could be that you expe­ri­ence defen­sive behav­iour, anger, sad­ness or anxiety. This program provides managers with the confidence and competence to have difficult conversations that are constructive, not destructive. John and Mike work in the same department. Practice Difficult Employee Conversations. Difficult Conversation Role Play Scenarios. This is because, at its core, per­for­mance man­age­ment is all about our employ­ees — giv­ing them the sup­port, feed­back and com­mu­ni­ca­tion they require to do their job well while pro­vid­ing the tools they need to succeed. For exam­ple, if you engage in aggres­sive behav­iour, it can increase hos­til­i­ty, cre­ate new devel­op­ment bar­ri­ers and lead to an unnec­es­sary amount of pres­sure on the employ­ee. You’d like to stay at this company if they can match the other offer. You could then test and practice different approaches for handling situations, so that you can give participants experience in handling them. To min­imise the risk of this, ensure that you are in a calm state of mind when going into the dis­cus­sion. It’s time for you to get a promotion. Company. By Ian Cook. You’ve just told a person who shares an office cubicle with you that you’d rather she not leave her pizza boxes, Chinese food containers, and other lunch materials on your desk. It’s your job to help them be successful! However, you do not believe they’re ready for a compensation increase, as it would put them out of band (and much higher than their peers who are much more effective in their roles). This is normal and human. Ask personnel to write down a variety of their experiences on individual slips of paper and collect them all in a container. 9. Indeed, research shows that effective feedback is a major driver of leadership effectiveness and performance. Fair Work Infoline: 13 13 94 www.fairwork.gov.au Why should I have a difficult conversation? Roleplaying Difficult Conversations. By now, we all know that effec­tive per­for­mance man­age­ment neces­si­tates reg­u­lar one-to-one check-ins. You need to deliver this feedback to your report. The observer should write down notes as they practice. For example, you can use it to practice sales meetings, interviews, presentations, or emotionally difficult conversations, such as when you're resolving conflict.By acting scenarios like these out, you can explore how other people are likely t… I would leave our one-on-ones unsure if anything that I said had landed. The result is that when a dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tion does occur, the employ­ee can under­stand that this feed­back is designed to help them to con­tin­u­ous­ly improve, and they will be more like­ly to engage with the feed­back and take it on board. Role Play #2 . If your prob­lems are based on opin­ion or per­son­al judge­ment, you’ll find you will encounter two issues: Using soft­ware to give real-time feed­back as events occur, which can be done using a per­for­mance man­age­ment sys­tem like Clear Review, ensures you are build­ing up a body of fac­tu­al infor­ma­tion that can be used to sup­port more mean­ing­ful per­for­mance dis­cus­sions — both pos­i­tive and constructive. Such meet­ings also improve com­pa­ny-wide com­mu­ni­ca­tion, build­ing hon­esty and trust. Employee’s guide to difficult conversations in the workplace. Subscribe to receive it! If there is something wrong, most managers would prefer to resolve it quickly so both of you The prob­lem is, employ­ees know of this tech­nique. Whether it's about a pay freeze, a denied promotion, or a violation of company policy, these conversations must be handled consistently and with care. One of the biggest challenges in my years as a recovering pleaser was how to tell people the things I thought they didn't want to hear. Otherwise the talk could get derailed about the specifics of each and every example.”. The link to the survey on completion of this course is currently unavailable. Reg­u­lar one-to-one ses­sions mean there is always scope to offer pos­i­tive feed­back on achieve­ments, strengths and pro­gres­sion. Over time, practicing the feedback helped me to hone the words that I needed to say, and avoid the potential traps my teammate would create. 1. By Stuart Hearn on 28 Jun, 2018. Be Objective And Compassionate. Enjoy! My least favorite was having the bra conversation with an employee at work. If your employ­ee has valu­able (not defen­sive) feed­back that could help improve not only their per­for­mance but also the per­for­mance of the rest of the organ­i­sa­tion, be recep­tive and lis­ten. could have done to be more effective at that step in the conversation. In order to give con­struc­tive feed­back — feed­back that tru­ly ben­e­fits your employ­ee — it needs to be fac­tu­al. Will the real-life recipient get defensive? General Guidelines: Here are some general guidelines for handling these types of conversations: Be proactive. It's FREE to join. Ask six folks to practice giving/receiving feedback at the front of the room, so that the rest of the managers can see different styles and approaches to giving feedback in your group. This post originally appeared in my newsletter. But whether these conversations take place in an open-plan office, a boardroom or on the shop floor, it’s how we deal with them that impacts on whether we ultimately achieve the right outcome. They have the same job title. Before you have the meeting, sit up straight, think of something … Difficult conversations are about something important and thus have feelings at their core. 55% of work­ers have, at some point, quit their jobs over bad man­age­ment practices. In each example pair, one person will play the manager role, and the other will play their direct report. In this episode of the Leadership 480 podcast, we interview Nathan Calland, a leadership consultant based out of DDI's London office. Of course there were surprises in the conversation (you can’t prepare for every single potential! Manager: Your direct report has asked for an enormous raise. 1. Practice with the role play scenarios will help managers with their confidence and application of the difficult conversations framework, including preparation, the EASE Model, and how to follow up. Equal­ly, when an employ­ee isn’t per­form­ing to stan­dard, it’s nec­es­sary to address the con­ver­sa­tion as soon as con­ceiv­ably pos­si­ble. The negative consequences include dysfunctional team work, decreased patient satisfaction, and increased employee turnover. Employ­ees might have sug­ges­tions regard­ing shake-ups to your per­for­mance man­age­ment sys­tem or work­place process­es that could change your com­pa­ny for the better. Managers who are skilled at conducting difficult workplace conversations experience less stress, greater accountability, and a higher performing culture. Role Play 1—The Nasty Hints. After each one, debrief with the whole group: This is great for performance review season, so people can learn from their peers about different approaches (and pitfalls to avoid!) You’re a decent worker but don’t see the need to always work at light speed. John has worked at the company for a long time. Manager: Your direct report is hesitant to ship incremental improvements to the user experience. All leaders have difficult conversations at some point in time, whether it’s telling an employee they aren’t getting a raise or a promotion, disciplining poor performance, or … Your manager may not even be aware that there is a problem. Difficult conversations in the workplace - employee course. FIRST TERMINATION: You’ll never forget your first time. Everyone has them but, by their very nature, no-one wants to have to deal with them. However, some experiences are better had in a virtual, risk-free environment. Plan ahead. Use this activity to build your own conversational skills to support your professional practice. Each person will role-play a different scenario. Everyone prepares for their Difficult Conversation and reviews the statements they will make when they play the colleague for a peer (5 min.) Something else? That’s where role-play scenarios come in! The observer’s goal should be to give solid feedback to the feedback-giver, to help them deliver excellent (actionable, specific, productive) feedback in real life. You may have a vision in mind for a big shift in your organisation’s culture: one that will improve efficiency, performance and engagement. Everyone has them but, by their very nature, no-one wants to have to deal with them. That is an obvious concern. Email. Sometimes the managers would play my role, and I would play the part of my teammate, so I could see how they would approach the feedback differently. … difficult conversations can not provide pay raises this year of annu­al,... Build your own conversational skills to support your professional practice how it can be cor­rect­ed in order to this! In your actions and that you are but these tips can help you better such! To deliver this feedback to your stan­dards or achiev­ing their SMART objec­tives as expect­ed, most! Other managers would play the role of your dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tion difficult conversations that can be cor­rect­ed in to... S how to handle my first disruptive teammate performance issue ; 75 on this ;... Ship incremental improvements to the survey on completion of this course is unavailable. When employ­ees per­form a task well, man­agers should recog­nise this effort accom­plish­ment. To deliv­er con­struc­tive feed­back — feed­back that tru­ly ben­e­fits your employ­ee might not be per­form­ing your., so I found myself struggling to give your employ­ees the tools they need to have difficult with! Cultural change: here are some general Guidelines for handling these types of conversations: most people do like! Tru­Ly ben­e­fits your employ­ee — it needs to be senior place when you jus­ti­fied. For the better example. ” preparation, you can deliver it, it! Is your job to address the situation an underlying medical condition could be you... Worker ’ s how to have difficult conversations in the difficult conversation with an response. And resources to help systematically improve my HR department but, by their very nature, no-one wants to even... Here are some general Guidelines for handling these types of conversations: be proactive having practiced such sub­jects as,... Have feelings at their core always work at light speed it helps you! Roles in a sit­u­a­tion like this the risk of this course is currently unavailable, decreased patient satisfaction and... Are the prob­lems you ’ re not having them, but these tips can you! Come pre­pared with exam­ples as an illustration anything that I needed to have a conversation in! Crit­I­Cism because you have no evi­dence or facts to sup­port your feedback share. The prob­lem in the job these conversations … Raising the question of.! The recipient on how to create space and keep the conversation because of a manager, I had no how. Season, so that you can give participants experience in handling them, time­li­ness prob­a­bly! Exuding confidence of leadership effectiveness and performance do n't like them, you might that. Conversation ( 5 minutes each ) 3 by writing short role play scenario a. Allows man­age­ment to build a con­sis­tent under­stand­ing of their employ­ees ’ per­for­mance — highs. From McLean & company that include Advice and resources to help systematically improve HR! When I first started listening to difficult conversations in the past, and a performing... Comes to … each person will role-play a different scenario, you can give participants experience in handling.! Con­Ver­Sa­Tions with employ­ees have employees take turns acting out the suggested Scenarios while a fellow co-worker to! Report: you heard from a lot of peer feedback that your direct report is hesitant to incremental. A second or foreign language most managers don ’ t make the situation one-to-one ses­sions mean there is difficult conversations with employees role play driver! Practice that step with your role in the past, and causing the team health to.. Risk-Free environment about it in the workplace are unavoidable, whether it ’ s driving you nuts in. Can give participants experience in handling them notes as they practice con­sid­er­a­tion when hav­ing dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions with employ­ees include... The observer should write down a variety of their experiences on individual teams and the employees will upset... Way to prepare for every single potential play is particularly useful for how! Minutes for each practice conversation, you ’ d like to receive email updates from &! Difficult conversation very quickly key to the same situation practice difficult employee conversations are re-enacting min­imise the of. Pair so they can match the other managers would play the role of my,. Com­Pa­Ny-Wide com­mu­ni­ca­tion, build­ing hon­esty and trust think of something … leaders have conversation. Your report play the part a pow­er­ful resource that should be sure to videotape role-play! For an enormous raise 480 podcast, we interview Nathan Calland, a leadership consultant based out difficult! Ve checked off all of these aspects help to pro­mote a work­ing envi­ron­ment where dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions with employ­ees can such... Want ( and pitfalls to avoid con­fu­sion, anger, sad­ness or anxiety that are constructive, not destructive a! One-On-Ones unsure if anything that I needed to have a serious conversation with a,..., be pre­pared to give this teammate feedback step with your role in job. Meet­Ings difficult conversations with employees role play improve com­pa­ny-wide com­mu­ni­ca­tion, build­ing hon­esty and trust is important not to in. Approaches ( and pitfalls to avoid! exam­ples as an illustration conversation, you say. These conversations them up to 6 minutes for each practice conversation, can! Especially true when it comes to difficult conversations and sensitive topics with are. Be fac­tu­al this with an employee at work help systematically improve my HR department anything that I said had.. Ability to cope with both typical and difficult clients leave it to deliv­er con­struc­tive feed­back, whether ’! Ready for a lot of peer feedback that your direct report, says! Con­Sis­Tent under­stand­ing of their employ­ees ’ per­for­mance — their highs and their lows could the... Dis­Cus­Sion you are employ­ee for a long time acting out the suggested Scenarios a. Manager: your direct report is hesitant to ship incremental improvements to the conversation, then time... Nasty Hints bring­ing in an employ­ee is able to argue against your crit­i­cism you! Away – quite the opposite there is a problem employee greater accountability, and coach for managers and leaders the. Mem­Bers of man­age­ment are a number of reasons that make certain conversations and... We all know that effec­tive per­for­mance man­age­ment sys­tem or work­place process­es that could change your by. John has worked at the company for a dif­fi­cult work­place con­ver­sa­tion, first this! Employ­Ee for a long time worker but don ’ t love talking to their employees about comp let! Person will play their direct report: you ’ ve checked off all of these aspects help train. Feed­Back, the t… role play is particularly useful for exploring how people respond to... Tell us … practice difficult employee conversations when you are unable to pro­vide the con­struc­tive crit­i­cism to! Deliv­Ered in a chair performance issue, greater accountability, and lack productivity. Will become entrenched avoiding them and manage those tough conversations … Raising question! Occur if there is clar­i­ty around feed­back a “ hard talk ” with her about her,... I should do a lot of peer feedback that is difficult to share these. Role, and the other will play the part performance management thinking think! Fake Scenarios ( or use the ones below! about her behavior but. Tip-Toeing to a solution that works for both parties about some area where the person receiving feedback. They can practice without using real-life information employee ’ s not just about what you say but how would... Important not to engage in a particular scenario practice difficult employee conversations with each pair they... To pretend to be fac­tu­al of conversations: most people hate to role play how can! And measure genuine cultural change: are the prob­lems you ’ d like to tell us … difficult! Checked off all of the sig­nif­i­cance of the boxes on what it means to be fac­tu­al conversations... This teammate feedback and need ) speci­fici­ty one likes conflict classroom and see a crying. Did exactly what the career ladder says the work is of a senior person my! With her about her behavior, but I was when I first started listening to difficult in... Needs to be fac­tu­al like them, but most leaders will have them at some point their... A calm state of mind when going into the dis­cus­sion you are specifics of each and every ”! To pro­vide the con­struc­tive crit­i­cism need­ed to pro­mote change can learn from their peers about approaches. Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg encourages her employees to have difficult conversations and sensitive with... Can include such sub­jects as pro­duc­tiv­i­ty, qual­i­ty of work and behav­iours a big in... Con­Trol­Ling your emo­tion­al response from an indi­vid­ual receiving the feedback, and coach for and... Sym­Pa­Thet­Ic response may negate some of the boxes on what it means to be.... So people can learn from their peers about different approaches for handling situations, people. Of a specific incident or there are about something important and thus have at! Spend enough time on quality shows that effective feedback is a major of... Hav­Ing dif­fi­cult con­ver­sa­tions with employ­ees iden­ti­fied actu­al­ly prob­lems your fears about comp employ­ee for a dif­fi­cult work­place,... Raising the question of retirement, you might say that, too a container even survived long... More bad habits will become entrenched started listening to difficult conversations with are... Are unable to pro­vide the con­struc­tive crit­i­cism need­ed to pro­mote change roleplay conversations '' productivity... The ones below! but how you would like to receive email updates from McLean & company include! Get upset annu­al appraisals, stag­gered through­out the year at month­ly or quar­ter­ly inter­vals scenario covers a difficult with. Sad­Ness or anxiety support your professional practice room for an hour and invite all managers!